This is Athena. She is 4-years-old and goes to the same home daycare that Oliver goes to. So far her life has been nothing short of heartbreaking, and it has made me and Charley so so sad. As I understand it, Athena's mom was really young when she had Athena. She didn't want Athena from the beginning. Apparently, she was kind of a partier and drowned in a local lake while she was partying one night. So Athena does not have a mother.
Athena then went to live with her grandparents, and they didn't supply a lot of positive reinforcement. She would act up to get attention, and they eventually decided that they couldn't handle her so they put her in the foster system. She was taken in by a man and woman who live in Barnstead. They had been trying to have kids, but weren't having any luck, so they decided to adopt Athena. She started calling them Mommy and Daddy. They then had their own baby! Weird how life works.
I guess life with Athena hasn't been easy. She has a lot of anger and attachment issues (can you blame her?) She's going to therapy for this, but really needs to be in therapy 3-4 times a week. She's started to be very aggressive and at times violent with her little "sister". Her "mom and dad" decided that they can't have a life where they are constantly worrying that she will hurt the baby, so they've decided that they need to give her up. She's going to end up back in the foster system. She needs to be in a household with older kids or no kids. And she needs someone who is willing to take her to therapy 4 times a week. That's not going to be easy to find.
She's really a sweet little girl. She sometimes has temper tantrums while she's at daycare and is very overdramatic, but Wendy (Oliver's caregiver), just leaves her alone and lets her work it out. Wendy doesn't yell, and she is very calm but firm--something Athena needs. Wendy also told me that her parents were trying to teach her some self-control in terms of her wanting to hug everyone she meets. She would go up to strangers and hug them...she's so starved for love. At the moment, there is literally no one who wants this child. There is really nothing more sad than that. And there is so much to love.
Charley and I are so sad about this. Charley said she wants to take her. I also wish we could. I just want to take her in and work with her and show her love and reassure her that I will never ever leave her. She needs people in her life that will be there for her forever. I told Charley that if we didn't have Oliver, I would seriously consider it. I think it would just be too much for me right now though with the baby. And not knowing if she would hurt him. So far, she's only shown aggression towards girls, but that could change.
My mom works with kids like this all the time. I've never had personal experience with one in my life, however. The worst thing is, I can see her future. I can see her being placed in yet another foster home and slipping through the cracks. I know she can be helped. I wish I could do it. I feel so helpless. Charley and I haven't been able to think about anything else since we found out about her situation yesterday. I wish wish wish I could help.
